3/24 Sumblog 6 Charlotte Perkins Gilman & Social Construction of Marriage

Since I'm going to school for marriage couselling I found the discussion and reading on Charlotte Perkins Gilman's perspective of marriage to be very interesting. It's important to notice how the social construction of marriage has drastically changed over the years. In Gilman's time marriage as she stated was looked at more as the husband as the employer and wife as the employee. We clearly know this is not true of every family today. I think the main reasons for this view of marriage in the past was that families were having more children. The woman did not have a chance to get into the work force steadily and therefore they were looked at as more of an asset in the home. Gilman believed the main economic value of woman was through men. They took care of the kids, made the food and took care of the house and in turn the man could focus more at his job. While this is the true reality of that time period and I completely agree with Gilmans view of what marriage was like, I dislike how things were in some aspects. I feel woman have much more of a value than just being looked at as a housewife. I don't think woman who stay home should only be viewed as economically valued through men even if they don't work.
Like I stated in class I strongly believe that one of the main reasons for divorce is because woman do not feel trapped in marriages anymore. Woman were so dependent on males in the past that I feel like they were often not even living their own lives. It's sad to think that men were able to go out and meet people and woman were often trapped in the home. I don't exactly know what the marriage live was back then, but i would think that the men often tried to have all of the control strictly because they were the money makers. Now woman can be economically stable on their own if they do not like the marriage they are in. Divorce is something I believe could often be avoided if individuals continue to work on their relationship instead of just going with the flow. I like that now woman who stay in marriages for the most part actually want the marriage to succeed instead of just being forced to stay in it because of money like in the past.
I liked the questions we were given at the start of class because I think they gave a good preview into our class about Gilman. It also made me reflect on what I'm really looking for in a marriage and how it compares to the way Gilman believed marriages were valued. One thing I dislike about Gilmans view of marriage is how much she placed on economic value. I personally could care a less about money with marriage, I would rather be happy and with someone who I want forever than worrying about marriage as benefiting more economically. Also, I would love for my wife to be a stay at home mom, but the reality is that most woman have to work in order to help providing for the family. One reason why woman are having to work more now is because children are looked at as an economic liability instead of economic asset. This means that the cost of having children and providing for them has really risen. This in turn means to help provide for children woman often need to work. I also don't like the idea of woman being the only ones raising the children. I love kids and I want to be there to raise my children as well. I also believe the household duties should be shared between men and woman.
Overall, I believe Gilman was accurate of the time period she lived in when it comes to marriage, but her theories are much less relevant now. However, I think they are still useful to show us how things used to be. We can look at how marriages were maybe based more on economics than happiness and that's never how a marriage should be in my opinion. Her reading and our discussion on her were very interesting and I learned a lot about something that really interests me.

This graph shows that of woman who are married that even in the last 50 years woman clearly are employed more often than in the past and also may be out earning their husband.The graph doesn't say more woman are employed more often now however it is implied by the drastic percent increase. This backs up one of my speculations that divorce is more common now because woman can depend on themselves economically.